


Half Broke Heart

by Bootsncatz (bootsncatz)



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Angst, Completed, F/F, One Shot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-03
Updated: 2017-08-03
Packaged: 2018-12-10 10:59:07
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11690226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bootsncatz/pseuds/Bootsncatz
Summary: Wynonna was used to being alone.  She was used to having her heart broken.  Which is why she only ever gave half her heart to break.  Less messy that way.





	Half Broke Heart

**Author's Note:**

> Hello all! This is a bit of a departure from my last fic. But I was listening to "Half Broke Heart" by Cam and it gave me inspiration for an angst fic. Even though the song is not angsty at all. Go figure.

The Earp Curse.

The curse that stated every man that had been put down by Wyatt Earp's gun would come back as a revenant and each Earp heir would have to battle them. It was kill or be killed.

Though, Wynonna wasn't convinced that was the only Earp Curse.

She sat in the corner of Shorty's whiskey in hand as she looked around the place with blurry eyes. The weight of peacemaker on her hip was a constant, but still always felt like a burden. It felt even heavier today for some reason and Wynonna could swear she was leaning a little more to one side then she was used to.

The whiskey burned her throat as she finished it, running her tongue over her front teeth to catch as much of the liquid as possible. She tilted her head to the side and looked over at the pool table which was decidedly empty. She could start a game...or she could just sit here and watch other people in this small town drink away their worries. She shook the glass, the sound of ice hitting the sides confirming that she needed a refill. 

Just one more, she told herself as she dragged her way out of the seat, Just one more and then I can go home.

If she was being honest with herself (which, when was she?), she should probably just head back to the homestead now. But the bar wasn't quite blurry enough for her liking yet. When she could start forgetting the mistakes of her past enough to make new ones, then she could go home. Maybe.

Mistakes like...John and Henry and Spencer (ugh, Spencer) and all the other boys she fucked to feel...wanted. To feel like she wasn't a freak. It started with that orderly in the mental institution that she was sent to after her Daddy died. He had kind eyes and always snuck her an extra pudding cup. He told her...he told her that he didn't think she was crazy. But if he didn't, why did he write that paper on how fucked up she was and submit it to a science journal?

That was Wynonna's first broken heart. The one she always vowed would be her last. 

It became "her thing". You know how a lot of girls have "a thing"? Well Wynonna wanted "a thing" so she made this whole tough girl, not giving a shit thing "her thing". She would hook up with a boy, he would make her feel better for about two seconds...and then he would leave. They always did. They used her, but she would insist she was using them. No one used an Earp. Especially her. 

They'd say, "I don't wanna break your heart". Well, joke was on them, because you can't break a heart that's not willing to be broken. That's what she would tell herself. She'd even joke and say, "It's alright. My hearts only half broke anyways."

But a half broke heart is still broken.

Not that Wynonna would ever admit it.

She had learned long ago to keep your emotions hidden. Ward Earp, her Daddy, had taught her that from a young age.

Ward had taught her to be guarded and hard. He would make Willa sit and learn how to clean and load a gun as soon as she was old enough to talk. Wynonna remembered watching her older sister sit there for hours until her small fingers were raw as she worked. She knew she was next. She may not have been the heir then, but Ward wanted all his girls to be able to defend themselves. 

He drove their Mom away. 

He would deny it, him and Willa...but he did.

All he could ever talk about was the curse. The Revenants who were coming for them and how they were all doomed to die eventually. He would die and Willa would take up Peacemaker. 

Right after Waverly was born, their Mom left. Somewhere between suffering under the hard hand of Ward Earp, watching her two daughters suffer the same wounds and having another baby girl, she had decided she’d had enough. After that, it had become Wynonna’s sole purpose in life to protect her baby sister. She was not going to stand aside and let her Daddy hurt her little sister the way Willa had. Even if that meant taking an extra beating to spare Waverly. Her Daddy would give her Waverly’s beating and then a couple of extra for being soft on her sister.

Sometimes on the nights when the orderly would sneak into her room at the institution, she wondered aloud if it really had been an accident that she shot her Daddy in the back. Maybe it hadn’t been an accident at all. Perhaps it was an act of desperation or her subconscious whispering to her that she would be better off without Ward. Waverly would be better without Ward.

It was something that followed her on the nights she drank juuuuust enough to let herself think about that day.

She had also convinced herself that Waverly was better off without her too. Her baby sister would be just fine growing up with Gus and Shorty. They were two stand up citizens of Purgatory. Much better then being raised by her looney bin sister only six years her senior. Yeah. Waverly would be fine. 

Wynonna came back to town, albeit begrudgingly. But her little sister's Daddy figure was dead and if that's not a time to finally come back home, she didn't know what was. It was perfect timing anyways, because the guy she'd been wasting her time with decided she was well...a waste of time. So he broke the half of her heart she allowed to be broken and carried on.

Going back to Purgatory wasn't anything like going home. But seeing Waverly was. She may have failed her the first time around, but she wasn't going to fail her again. Waves was her baby sister to guide and protect. She was so small so...fragile it seemed. At least to Wynonna. Dolls and Doc seemed to think she could handle herself, but Wynonna would always remember when the two of them built a blanket fort in Wy's room. They slept there to keep the monsters away that Waverly was so afraid of, the ones Wynonna had sworn to protect her from. Well, now those monsters were back. Only this time they knew their name: Revenants.

And Wynonna did protect her. She saved her from being hanged and helped out her awful friends when zombie things were coming. Big sister was there to save the day. Wynonna finally belonged. It was just her and Waverly, living on the Homestead and kicking ass. They would beat the curse, grow into old hags like those 'Grey Gardens' ladies from the movie Waves had made her watch once...it was fine. Wynonna was home, and for once she wasn't alone.

She hardly noticed when Waverly started looking at Nicole with longing eyes. She definitely didn't notice the way Nicole's gaze would linger. Or maybe she did and she just didn't want to acknowledge them. Waverly had just barely shaken Champ off of her, she didn't need to latch on to someone else. Plus she wasn't even gay...Right?

Waverly was hers. She was her little sister...they were going grow old together. They had to. Waverly was the only person Wynonna had left.

Doc and Dolls had their own things going on. They didn't need her. But Waverly did. She was finally needed.

Sure, you could argue that she was needed to break the Earp Curse. But obviously, if she died the next in line would become the Earp heir and the controller of Peacemaker. So she wasn't really needed.

_"Are you an Nicole like...best friends now?"_

The words had come of fa little more biting then she had intended, but the question would remain the same. The implication, maybe, was not apparent. Was Nicole stealing Waverly away from her?

_"I love her."_

Wynonna swore that she had just been shot after those words slipped from Waverly's lips. The ache in her chest...a warmth...she could have sworn she was shot. Waverly was choosing Nicole over the family...over her. Wynonna wanted to say that the curse was more important, but the way that her sister was looking at her...begging...she couldn't deny her. She handed the gun to Willa and hoped for the best. 

Then there were two. Two remaining Earps. One other person in the world Wynonna could rely on.

At least Nicole was a good person. That's what Wynonna kept telling herself. But even after the hoopla was done, she still felt Waverly slipping away. She would spend less and less time at the Homestead and when she was there, Nicole was almost always with her. Sure there were other things going on. Demon goo and widows or...whatever. But her sister was being taken away from her.

So maybe...maaaaybe she took it out on Nicole a little bit. She would admit she said some pretty mean things to her, but they weren't necessarily wrong. And plus the second time she could totally blame it on being possessed by a fucking demon. Even if the demon literally stole those thoughts from her mind and just verbalized it. But Waverly never had to know that.

Once, after way too much whiskey, Wynonna looked in her sister's eyes and considered telling her everything. Considered telling her that she was the only one she had left and she was scared shitless Nicole was going to take her away forever. The words were on the tip of her tongue. They'd hurt, but they'd be the truth. The truth hurts, right? Kind of like the truth that her little sister didn't need her anymore. Talk about a bullet to the chest. The worst part was, she knew if she told Waverly she didn't like Nicole...if she told her she didn't trust her and wanted them to break up...she might actually do it. Waverly would actually leave Nicole. For her. But, god, the way they looked at each other. 

What Wynonna wouldn't give for someone to-

Nope. She wasn't going to go down that path. Another shot instead.

She would never tell Waverly how she felt. Since she had come back to town her sole purpose had been to protect Waverly. To keep her safe and happy. That included swallowing her loneliness and letting Waverly be. Letting her be happy. Even with Nicole. Even without her big sister.

It was okay, Wynonna told herself. It was just another day, another person who didn't really need her. Her half broke heart would beat on. Another shot, another day.


End file.
